Randomness (the not-so-Minnesota-nice kind)

Mind purge this morning...about to commence...

The cold has finally hit and there it is, yet another adjustment I have to make in my life. I can handle the twenties but when the wind picks up and the temps are in the teens, I feel so shut in. The sky darkens at 5:00 and every remaining bit of garden foliage is crisp and droopy. Strange combination, to be crisp and droopy at the same time.

Glucose test this week and so am eating healthy. Ugh. I just want a big glass of berry lemonade, maybe some french toast. Not that the eating isn't good. Last night we had ribeyes, cajun-roasted sweet potatoes, and a huge salad. But then, I want chocolate cake after that, a five-layer cake that I heard about on the Splendid Table, the kind that I would consume at Coffee News Cafe with a large glass of red wine accompanied by my friend Lone Star . Most of all, I want to make some monkey bread. Gah. I'm going nuts over those things I can't have.

Oh, yes, Lone Star is coming up from Texas next Saturday. I haven't seen her in four years, at least. She's coming for my baby puja and we do intend to eat at all those yummy places that she misses in Minnesota. Gotta get the house cleaned before she comes and have to enlist the help of D as I can't be around too many of the deep cleaning products.

Thirty other relatives are coming into town, too. And, my mother is driving me crazy. And, the seamstress who was supposed to sew my sari blouse says she may not have someone to do it. Ugh. Indian-run small businesses drive me crazy, just like my mom. Sad to say, but I'm taking my white husband into that shop to see if that will persuade her to get the job done. Or else if that fails, I'm going to take all the materials and a refund and see if the tailor down the street might be able to so some sari blouse magic. The shop owner has had the material for over a week now, I don't understand why she just didn't say she couldn't do it, rather than hanging on to the material for so long.

Not feeling so "Minnesota Nice" this morning. Hence the change in the title of this blog. Slowly, slowly I'm finding my way into a medium that is suitable for my existence. I love this city, I do. But, there are some things that get to me sometime, like the cold, the snotty Indian community separated from the friendly folk in Chicago, Houston, New York. I think they are so snotty because it's mostly middle to upper class Indian folk, those who have elite jobs and such. None of the ordinary folk like the ones that reside in larger cities. Or maybe it's just me. I removed myself from that social class when I married my working class man from Nordeast Minneapolis.

Ugh. Randomness...

The Big D and I got a health club membership that ends up being relatively cheap when the health insurance benefits kicks in, just have to get there 12 times a month. I've enjoy our late afternoon workouts on the weekends. During the week, I tend to go by myself either late morning or early afternoon. He goes after work so then, doesn't return home until about 7:00. This give me plenty of time to cook and I've developed a new relationship with the late afternoon and early evening in terms of productivity. The weekends are just wonderful. I love looking across the room and seeing him sweat on the elliptical machine while I take my non-sweaty walk on the treadmill. I feel so good when we're done and walking to the Jeep. Unfortunately, I woke this morning thinking this is all going to end.

One of us will have to stay with the baby, so no more joint work-out weekends. That led me to think, if he keeps the same weekly schedule, he won't get home until the baby is sleeping. So when is he going to have time with the baby? His work won't give him any paid time off when the baby comes unless he uses his vacation time. Why? Isn't it important in this country for fathers to bond with their newborns? And, on top of all that, he's applying for another job that's located way south of the Cities, so if he gets it, he won't be here much at all. The money would be great, the lack of time together would be tragic. Why must these be the choices in front of us?

The sun is shining today. And I have plans for wild rice soup and a baked acorn squash.

Reading Kingsolver's Animal, Vegetable, Miracle has me regretting all that I didn't do this season. I didn't can, I didn't blanch and freeze, etc, etc. I keep telling myself - I did grow a baby. And she is kicking like crazy, so she must be robustly healthy. One more thing - my mother suggested that a manicure might be harmful for the baby. I've had exactly one manicure in my life and I thought a second one might be nice for the baby puja next weekend. I was dumbfounded and infuriated with her comment. My response was that she's fine with me eating pesticide-laden foods from the conventional grocery store, but is skeptical of getting my nails polished? She told me I was being overly-dramatic and that all grocery stores are like that. WTF?! Why are people so complacent about the food production in this country?

Watched Wall-E last night and it made me cry, just like the first time I saw it. I thought I was over my pregnancy emotion-filled state, but here it is again...OK. Bye Bye.

My Yoga Partners

Faithful and true. These two always join me on the mat. Sometimes it can get a bit crowded or one of them get a little scratchy or bitey. Nonetheless I welcome the company.

Co-op Election Day

Today my whole life could change, or, remain exactly the same as it was yesterday and the day before.

Sometime last August I got it into my head to run for the Eastside Co-op Board of Directors. It was the friendly recruiter (and Board member) in the entryway of the store that enticed me. I attended a few board meetings and was duly impressed by the level of expertise and passionate interests present. They all seemed so concerned with many of the things I am interested in. I wanted to be part of this functional, productive group that seemed to be working towards making genuine change in this world and actually making progress towards this goal.

I thought I would join up as there were four open seats. Later I found that the both the Board president and vice-president are also running which makes me very nervous about the prospect of losing these leaders on the Board. There are three other prospective Board members and myself.

I am the first person of color to run for the Board. I can't figure out if that is an advantage or disadvantage. I do know that I have never been successful at such things, thinking primarily here about student council in my younger years, but what the heck. Maybe voting members will see my candidacy as building diversity at the Co-op. And that is the primary thing that I think I can provide - making connections with the diverse communities that make up the Central Avenue Business District.

But, the Co-op is a tight community. Some of the members seems clique-ish to me and that could mean this a tough group to penetrate.

I'm going to try. And if I succeed, this could lead me into a whole new direction in my life. Wish me luck, you'all!

Eh bien, tant pis!

So, I'm reading Julia Child's "My Life in France," it's a snowy/rainy Friday afternoon, my cravings satiated with vanilla bean ice cream, and suddenly I wander onto this page in a chapter subsection entitled "Never Apologize." After cooking a lunch of vile eggs for a friend, Julia had this to say:

"We ate the lunch with painful politeness and avoided discussing its taste. I made sure not to apologize. This was a rule of mine.

I don't believe in twisting yourself into knots of excuses and explanations over the food you make....Maybe the cat has fallen into the stew, or the lettuce has frozen, or the cake has collapsed--eh bien, tant pis!

Usually one's cooking is better than one thinks it is. And if the food is truly vile, as my ersatz eggs Florentine surely were, then the cook must simply grit her teeth and bear it with a smile--and learn from her mistakes."

The cat has fallen into the stew? Can't say this has ever happened in my kitchen, but I also can't say that something I've cooked hasn't tasted like the cat had fallen in.

Dear, sweet, resilient and reassuring D! He always eats my food with a smile and refuses to hear any apologies I might mutter. Learning from my mistakes is much easier when living with a man like that!

September Color

I knew this month is the time for changes, but I didn't realize that the changes were already happening. The color is wonderful and is evidence of the very cool evenings. This photo was taken up at the Wisconsin land about 1 1/2 hours north of the Cities. The changes happen there much sooner in the year.

Changes. I came home and deactivated my facebook account. How's that for change? Strange how twenty-year old high school angst can follow one around in life. Why does it feel like the popular people get a second chance for their popularity in facebook and blogging? Jeez, I feel like an immature nerd.

September Color

I knew this month is the time for changes, but I didn't realize that the changes were already happening. The color is wonderful and is evidence of the very cool evenings. This photo was taken up at the Wisconsin land about 1 1/2 hours north of the Cities. The changes happen there much sooner in the year.

Changes. I came home and deactivated my facebook account. How's that for change? Strange how twenty-year old high school angst can follow one around in life. Why does it feel like the popular people get a second chance for their popularity in facebook and blogging? Jeez, I feel like an immature nerd.

Red Hot Chili Peppers

These of course are grown for the Big D. I overheard him the other days referring to the red hot chili peppers as he was watering the garden. I remember when we first hooked up and started merging living spaces, Blood Sugar Sex Magik was one of the few CDs that we both had. Weird how this is the first time I've noticed how prophetic this title is for our lives together. Being married to a diabetic the words "blood sugar" is so frequently used in this household. And "sex magik"? Yah, sure, we sure as hell found that!

Red Hot Chili Peppers

These of course are grown for the Big D. I overheard him the other days referring to the red hot chili peppers as he was watering the garden. I remember when we first hooked up and started merging living spaces, Blood Sugar Sex Magik was one of the few CDs that we both had. Weird how this is the first time I've noticed how prophetic this title is for our lives together. Being married to a diabetic the words "blood sugar" is so frequently used in this household. And "sex magik"? Yah, sure, we sure as hell found that!

End of summer blooms

What can I say? I'm a sucker for shooting flowers. This morning every single one in the garden seemed to be posing for shots. It's the end of August, meaning it's the end of summer. The State Fair started today and that always signifies the end of summer and the beginning of the school year. And now, for the third year in a row, I am now longer affected by this cycle. Still feeling adrift...but at least I'm surrounded by beautiful flowers.

End of summer blooms

What can I say? I'm a sucker for shooting flowers. This morning every single one in the garden seemed to be posing for shots. It's the end of August, meaning it's the end of summer. The State Fair started today and that always signifies the end of summer and the beginning of the school year. And now, for the third year in a row, I am now longer affected by this cycle. Still feeling adrift...but at least I'm surrounded by beautiful flowers.

Glory in the Morning

This summer is the first time I noticed the fleeting life a morning glory. I imagine the short life is not so apparent when there are many dozens of this flower growing in one area, say on a fence or trellis. I have mine twining up thin bamboo stakes and every couple of days one or two will gloriously bloom. But by the evening the flower is a wilted remnant.





With just a slight shift in stance or focus, the picture changes so dramatically. And this is my lesson for the day. Change the perspective slightly and a whole new vision is formed. This is what I am trying as a means to understand all the changes in my life. I recently heard a radio program on WOJB that discussed the healing therapy of art. The program made me think about my photography in so many new ways. Perhaps with each frame there will be something more for me to learn.

Glory in the Morning

This summer is the first time I noticed the fleeting life a morning glory. I imagine the short life is not so apparent when there are many dozens of this flower growing in one area, say on a fence or trellis. I have mine twining up thin bamboo stakes and every couple of days one or two will gloriously bloom. But by the evening the flower is a wilted remnant.





With just a slight shift in stance or focus, the picture changes so dramatically. And this is my lesson for the day. Change the perspective slightly and a whole new vision is formed. This is what I am trying as a means to understand all the changes in my life. I recently heard a radio program on WOJB that discussed the healing therapy of art. The program made me think about my photography in so many new ways. Perhaps with each frame there will be something more for me to learn.

What's this about?

Who knows? Not me. But, there it is and it is here.

The Universe told me today:

Next time you make a wish, Lotus, wish for what is, because really and truly, things don't get much better than this.

There is a purpose, a plan, and a reason for all things. What doesn't make sense, will make sense. You are exactly where you should be; your challenges are what they should be; your rewards are what they should be; and the best is yet to come. Time has served you well. Love is in the air. And you're looking mighty good in the light that now surrounds you.

A toast to life... to you... to us... The Universe

And, so, I choose to believe. This is where I am supposed to be, and so I will be.

The trail, I ask myself, where is the trail leading? Does the answer even matter, aside from the idea that it leads away and out?

Away from what? And out of where? My life is good, but I can't help dwelling on the idea that there's got to be more. More of what? Something. There's got be something more. And yet, don't I live in a culture where everyone is seeking more? Isn't this totally contradictory to the message from the Universe?

Gods! Who cares! Just be!

So, what's this about?

I meant to write about things in my life that seemed to be "alternative," my CSA, for example. But, just last night I threw away a ton of root vegetables that have been sitting in the bottom storage bin of my refrigerator. In previous years I had taken all those roots - turnips, beets, carrots, parsnips (ok, maybe not the parsnips cuz they smell nasty to me!), celeriac - and cooked them up into really delicious eggrolls. Frozen-ed them, like my mother is fond of saying, and ate them until spring came around with a new crop of local, organic produce. But, this year, or rather, last year in 2008, this project just didn't happen. It's a bitch to cook up the filling, assemble and fry 80-100 eggrolls by my own self. Jeez! I need some female friends that like doing crazy things like this.


photo from Harmony Valley Farm 12-18-08 newsletter.


So, a few words about CSAs. CSA stands for community-supported-agriculture, which is a fancy way of saying we've bought shares in a local farm and they deliver to us once a week whatever they happen to harvest that week. Look to the sidebar for a link to our CSA - Harmony Valley Farm. The first year we signed up, I ate vegetables that I'd never even heard of before. Everything turned out to be yummy, except the parsnips which smell na-aa-aa-sty! The great thing was that I didn't have to figure out what to cook for dinner, I just had to figure how to cook that things I got from the CSA. The first year was a dream with the delivery boxes topping 30 lbs. of produce goodness during the peak summer harvest.

This is our third year. The last two years were not as bountiful as the first. The farm, which is technically one state away from me, but close enough over the border to be considered local, was inundated with rain, rain, lots of rain, 17 inches of it in one night. Nearly the entire crop was lost, but those dang parsnips survived. The next spring, the same happened - so much rain that the fields were flooded again. It was early enough in the season to replant, so this year was good, although a little later than usual.

Now's the time to sign up for spring 2009. So, please consider looking into one in your region. It is a natural and economical way to eat healthier. The Big D and I suffer from withdrawal during the winter months - the vegetables are that good.

What's this about?

Who knows? Not me. But, there it is and it is here.

The Universe told me today:

Next time you make a wish, Lotus, wish for what is, because really and truly, things don't get much better than this.

There is a purpose, a plan, and a reason for all things. What doesn't make sense, will make sense. You are exactly where you should be; your challenges are what they should be; your rewards are what they should be; and the best is yet to come. Time has served you well. Love is in the air. And you're looking mighty good in the light that now surrounds you.

A toast to life... to you... to us... The Universe

And, so, I choose to believe. This is where I am supposed to be, and so I will be.

The trail, I ask myself, where is the trail leading? Does the answer even matter, aside from the idea that it leads away and out?

Away from what? And out of where? My life is good, but I can't help dwelling on the idea that there's got to be more. More of what? Something. There's got be something more. And yet, don't I live in a culture where everyone is seeking more? Isn't this totally contradictory to the message from the Universe?

Gods! Who cares! Just be!

So, what's this about?

I meant to write about things in my life that seemed to be "alternative," my CSA, for example. But, just last night I threw away a ton of root vegetables that have been sitting in the bottom storage bin of my refrigerator. In previous years I had taken all those roots - turnips, beets, carrots, parsnips (ok, maybe not the parsnips cuz they smell nasty to me!), celeriac - and cooked them up into really delicious eggrolls. Frozen-ed them, like my mother is fond of saying, and ate them until spring came around with a new crop of local, organic produce. But, this year, or rather, last year in 2008, this project just didn't happen. It's a bitch to cook up the filling, assemble and fry 80-100 eggrolls by my own self. Jeez! I need some female friends that like doing crazy things like this.


photo from Harmony Valley Farm 12-18-08 newsletter.


So, a few words about CSAs. CSA stands for community-supported-agriculture, which is a fancy way of saying we've bought shares in a local farm and they deliver to us once a week whatever they happen to harvest that week. Look to the sidebar for a link to our CSA - Harmony Valley Farm. The first year we signed up, I ate vegetables that I'd never even heard of before. Everything turned out to be yummy, except the parsnips which smell na-aa-aa-sty! The great thing was that I didn't have to figure out what to cook for dinner, I just had to figure how to cook that things I got from the CSA. The first year was a dream with the delivery boxes topping 30 lbs. of produce goodness during the peak summer harvest.

This is our third year. The last two years were not as bountiful as the first. The farm, which is technically one state away from me, but close enough over the border to be considered local, was inundated with rain, rain, lots of rain, 17 inches of it in one night. Nearly the entire crop was lost, but those dang parsnips survived. The next spring, the same happened - so much rain that the fields were flooded again. It was early enough in the season to replant, so this year was good, although a little later than usual.

Now's the time to sign up for spring 2009. So, please consider looking into one in your region. It is a natural and economical way to eat healthier. The Big D and I suffer from withdrawal during the winter months - the vegetables are that good.